Saturday, February 11, 2012

Confused. Pain.
Relationshipis always like this.
10% sweetness + 50% pain and bitterness. The other 40%, i have not figure out what it is. I hope it is happiness. Or maybe it's just despair.

Sometimes relationships really cuts. And it is forever the most mysterous and magical thing of all. Love. It can turn strangers into such close.. couples. And yet, it could also take away all that closeness in a single second.

Damn it.
I FEEL LIKE I BARELY KNOW YOU ANYMORE!
i feel like i'm losing you slowly.. bit by bit. Or rather, i'm slowly losing myself. Losing my mind. Losing my heart. Losing my soul.

Fuck. i sound like a freaking stupid and emotional girl which i definitely am not. I know this way of thinking is really childish. I know there may be a lot of things going on. And i am certain that compared to all that work, all that burdens, feelings may really seem insignificant. My feelings may seem insignificant. Or even too childish to even talk about.
But i cant help it. Damn it. I cannot. Like a kid. I feel neglected. I hate those changes. Hate it when you are not around. Hate it when i cannot see you every second. Hate it when i cannot touch you whenever i want. At least not now.

Thinking about the past, the more happiness ive managed to collect resulted in the large number of unhappiness i am having now. I miss you. But it seem so damn stupid to say this. So kid. But i am not going to change. I never will. I just want to be me. And this is me.

Damn it. I freaking hate this.

Sometimes i just want to drop everything.
Sometimes i wish you could drop everything
Drop that heavy burden
Drop that serious thinking
Drop all those worries
And just enjoy
Enjoy life. Be happy. With me.

I know it's hard. But i wish you could just try. Cause sometimes it really pains me. To see you so.. serious, so adult and so.. unhappy. And there's nothing i could do about it. I'm seriously losing this. I think i'm just hopelessly romantic. Thinking about the impossible, impractical dreams.
but that is really just all i want.
Eternity ♥ 2/11/2012 09:29:00 PM link to post